A fizzled memory of
the un-comfortable silence
on the phone,
I'd built a cage around
my denial of you
and put myself in it,
since it felt safer.
I avoided your eyes,
avoided you.
You probably deserved better from me.
If it's any consolation,
a ghost haunts my brain
with visions of how I might
have saved you, and wonders aloud
"good god I hope she wasn't alone,"
afraid that you could have been.
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